The 77th Academy Awards Recap

If you are a fan of award shows (or if you tuned in to watch Desperate Housewives or Boston Legal last night) then you got to take part in the magic that was the 77th Annual Academy Awards!

And if you are reading this now, then you are privileged to witness the magic that is the CityCynic.com Academy Awards Recap! (Don’t worry, it’s much shorter in length than my previous lengthy live blogging efforts.) Here it is in encapsulated OSCAR/NO OSCAR-rated format:

NO OSCAR: First off, host Chris Rock is always funnier when he writes his own jokes. And let me tell you, Rock’s odd observations about Hollywood celebrities were really subpar for a comedian who is almost always on. He wasn’t the worst awards show host, but he also wasn’t the best. Let’s just leave it as ‘adequate’ and move on.

OSCAR: The musical performances of the night were a collection just eclectic enough to prove interesting. The Counting Crows sounded amazing, even with lead singer Adam Duritz sporting an ‘ode to Sideshow Bob’ haircut. The Beyonce/Josh Groban duet was a nice pairing of voices (more on Beyonce performances in a minute) and even The Motorcycle Diaries’ Spanish-language “The Other Side of the River” Antonio Banderas/Santana collaboration was good, if not surprising.

NO OSCAR: Got Beyonce? Attracting younger viewers is a difficult task for some awards shows. But there’s certainly a way not to do it. Like, say, having Beyonce sing *THREE* different songs throughout the show — and one of the songs being in French with a bunch of school boys. And I thought seeing all those Oscar statues spinning around the back of the stage was overdoing it… they could have renamed the program The Beyonce Show last night.

OSCAR: Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek presenting multiple awards was verrrrrrrrry nice. And I’m not just saying that because they are dos mujeres bonitas. Actually I am saying it because of that.

NO OSCAR: The camera shot of award winners’ families all sitting together in a box on the side of the theater. Yeah, we get it, they’re proud of them. And, yes, that camera shot was cool. But not multiple times. It was almost used as many times as Beyonce performed!

OSCAR: The President of the Academy dedicating the show to soldiers fighting in Iraq and elsewhere overseas was not only appropriate, but a poignant moment in the show as well.

NO OSCAR: Although the producers of the show didn’t have to cut many people off during the night’s acceptance speeches, the fact that they still do that is just annoying.

OSCAR: Scarlett Johannson — beautiful. Enough said.

OSCAR: Some of the acceptance speeches were actually interesting. Like 10% of them, which is high for an awards show. Like director Sidney Lumet’s brilliant acceptance speech after being awarded a Lifetime Achievement Award.

NO OSCAR: In non-brilliant acceptance speeches, Hillary Swank said, “I’m just a girl from a trailer park who had a dream.” It was one of those statements meant to be taken seriously, but just so odd and disturbing that people listening don’t know whether to laugh or to pause for a moment and then laugh. She’s a great actor, but mentioning her humble beginnings and then thanking her lawyer, agent, and publicist right after hardly evoked much emotion.

NO OSCAR: The show ran over by 15 minutes. Not surprising, but I think 2 and 1/2 hours is plenty of time to give out awards.

NO OSCAR: The audio hissing. Maybe it was only heard in the HDTV broadcast, but every time a microphone was turned on, noticeable audio distortions could be heard. Who’s in charge of the audio over there people?

OSCAR: Did I mention Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek presenting awards together? Oh right, I think I did. Ay Carumba! Well, how about Natalie Portman? Stunning!

Overall, the 77th Academy Awards was good as far as awards show go. Not a tight program by any means, but all the pieces were there, even if 33% of them involved Beyonce.